We're home from spending time with my family over the holidays.  The next couple days will reveal if this 3rd round of IUI worked for us.  I can't say enough how wonderful it was being home.  Being surrounded by family especially over Christmas is such a precious gift.  As I get older the greatest gift each year is celebrating family, the love we share, and most of all the love and forgiveness of our Savior Jesus Christ.  That is much to celebrate.  We were so incredibly busy over the holidays I had no time to dwell on the fact that I might be pregnant or I might not.  I honestly didn't think about it much at all and that was wonderful to me.   The mental break from it was welcomed.   I get so wrapped up in this sometimes I forget to enjoy the other things God is giving me everyday.  I don't want to miss his other blessings. 
          Spending time with our nephews is always enjoyable.  Little Rick is such a talker now- he's a very smart little guy and he teaches us new things everytime we're home.  He loves to sing and dance and he just started writing his name.  It's so much fun watching him grow up.  Cristian is the protector.  If anyone is messing with his mama he is all over that.  He's going to be a great brother as they get older and look out for his family no doubt.  His smile lights up a room and his hugs make me want to melt.  He loves to cuddle when you catch him at the right time.  I soaked that up.  Miguel is a very content little baby.  He's probably already learned he's just going to have to go with the flow with his two older brothers who constantly go.  He's got these big squishy cheeks and he's just beginning to smile and coo.  
         This time leaving home was quite difficult.  I finally gave my mom the news and updated her on what we had been going through.  She didn't probe or ask but I felt like it was time to tell her what was going on.  Dave and I never intended to hide this from our families but of course wanted our baby news to be a big suprise to everyone when we announced it.  We just had no idea it would take this long to get pregnant.  The longer it has taken the more we felt like we were hiding something from those we love.  I know that our families will be praying for us and that gives me comfort to know even more are praying for our baby.  The goodbye sadness caught me off guard.  I think sharing this with my mom made the goodbye a little harder.  I gave my dad a hug who always says something that makes you feel so incredibly loved which started the tears, and then a goodbye hug to Christine really did me in.  Saying goodbye to the nephews is getting hard too!   Anyways I managed to makek it to our car and wave goodbye and finally stopped crying down the road.  I told Dave I had no idea where that came from but it was sudden and there was no stopping it.  He just took my hand and smiled giving me a reassurance that it was ok.  
            I return to work tomorrow and will probably have a very busy day.  Mondays are always our busiest day and after a holiday wknd. even more so.  I wish we had more time off.  Dave has tomorrow off so he'll be taking our Christmas decorations down and getting some stuff done around the house since we've been gone for a while.  And then he'll come take me on a lunch date:)  
           When we got home tonight I had a pink show which typically signifies  my period.  I'm trying not to think about it but think tomorrow will prove to be a rough day back esp. if my period decides to come also. 
           This song has given me comfort lately as I know that his hands are holding us through this.  I've gone through a period of pushing him away and feeling like our prayers are not being answered.  But I know that he is sovereign and I will look back on this trial we're going through and thank him for strengthening my faith.    If you are going through a trial, I pray that you feel the comfort of our Father's love.  I pray that you truly know He is enough. 

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